I told you about the basketball game and how Lagertha tried to take my head off.  If you didn't, see "I Hate Monday," because you will want to know how I jacked up my hand.

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I went home after playing ball at Axiom rather than going to the doctor. Look, I've been to the doc so many times I knew what he/she would tell me.  Yeah I jacked up my knuckle, put some ice on it and take some pain medicine, it will be better in a few weeks.

I cleaned horse stalls, helped get a guitar restrung, even played some. Then as we went to bed I showed Miss Sympathy, Brenda, who looked at me and said, "Nice job, bet that hurts. You may want to elevate that when you go to bed." Bedside manner of a "Viking" doctor (See I Hate Monday).

I went to the kitchen and managed to get one of the Rhodes rolls that Dr. Viking had made, (all three dozen would be gone by morning), then crawled into bed.

Why is it things start hurting when you start to relax.  It was stupid trying to get some sleep. Just about the time I would start to nod off, my hand would start throbbing.  I tried sleeping on my back, but I would start to snore and Brenda would shove a pillow down my throat.  I tried my right side, bad move, stomach, no good, finally I rolled over on my left side with my hand slightly elevated in front of my face....Oh yeah, sleep here I come....ZZZZZZZZ.

In order for the next part to make perfect sense, you will have to understand the sleeping arrangements at our home.  If you are at the foot of our bed, Brenda sleeps on the right side and I sleep on the left. So when I had rolled over on my left side and put my hand so gently on my pillow in front of my face, I in fact left it exposed to Sudden Nocturnal Assault, also known as SNA.

Brenda in her half sleep had executed a perfect SNA.  She rolled from her left side to her right, flopping her hand around looking for her "Lumpy Pillow" and hit my hand.  She not only did this once, but three more times with the final time being a SNAG (Sudden Nocturnal Assault Grab). Yes, in her failure to find her "Lumpy Pillow," she grabbed my hand and threw it to the side.  I felt pain all the way to my toes.

I did a gator roll, hit the fetal position and whimpered like the manly man I am.  So, if you listened this morning and I sounded a little snarky, it was because of a SNAG. Now you know the lack of "rest of the story."  (There are those who are old enough to get it)

BTW, the thing that hurts the worst is having to type on a keyboard.

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