What’s Your Argument Style? Find Out Here…
It's fascinating to me to watch other people argue...or not. I'm one of those people who over-analyzes things and has to know why I'm the way I am and why others act differently. I had no idea we all had our own "style" of argument. Figure out your type and how to come up with solutions. Go figure. A solution? Ha!
Think about the last time you had an argument or full-blown fight with your significant other. Keep in mind how you acted and how they acted. How would you categorize your "style"? This is from The Stir (they also have a more elaborate description and explanation).
1. THE DRAMATIC DUO
The arguments are fueled by passion and it's likely going to end up with one person sleeping on the couch or at a friend's house. Things are thrown, voices are loud and nothing truly gets resolved.
Solution: Sit down. Changing locations allows your brain to work a little better.
2. THE WE-AGREE-ON-EVERYTHING TWINS
I knew (still know of) a couple who literally does everything together. This is to the point where they have to sit side-by-side at a desk. Yes, they work together. You can't talk to one about a situation that involves the other because they will never see a different point of view. These are the people who just casually say, "We never argue."
Solution: Check in with yourself. Is it truly "fine" all the time?
I'll add a little something: Form your own opinion. Be someone. Let your inner voice be heard, for heaven's sake. You are a unique individual and you matter.
3. THE OVERANALYZERS
Hi, I'm Tawsha and I'm an over-analyzer. This is totally how I argue. Add that along with not being able to come up with examples to support my argument and it's all just a hot mess.
This couple (eh hem...thooooose people) pick everything apart - including the argument. This can often lead to focusing on all that's wrong in a relationship rather than what's right. We'll name this couple the "nitpicky couple".
Solution: Ask questions rather than assume you know the answers. Before accusing and wondering why, ask the question. The answer may not even be what you thought.
More on The Stir.
4. THE SHE-SAID-HE-RUNS
All it takes is "Honey, we need to talk" and it's game over. One of you wants to talk and the other wants to just ignore what's really going on.
Solution: Maybe a discussion isn't what's best. Prepare for the chat and have a solution in mind.
5. THE SILENT-BUT-DEADLIES
You don't argue much and you don't yell, you just let everything build up inside. Hello ulcer! There's visible tension between you but no resolution...until you reach a breaking point. Then it's like confetti - all the problems exploding all over the place. It's not pretty.
Solution: Be vocal. At least a little bit. Give a warning that you're going to be silent and you don't want to fight about it. What happens next could surprise you.
More on The Stir.